Thursday, April 10, 2008

my mom sent this to me....classic.

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it
 becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as
 when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them.
 Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive
My name is Roger. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my
 wife, Diane. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for
 Diane to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for
 extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after
 she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I
 usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home
 from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to
 rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at
 her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she
 gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at
 the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some
 home-cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's
 not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner.
I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each
 evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates
 this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes
 to bed. 
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will
 say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
 during her lunch hour but, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I
 just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over
 two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I
 also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt
 her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my
 strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods.
 She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the lawn.
 I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a
 nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a
 while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well
 make one for me too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Diane.
 I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men
 will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows
 better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However,
 guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your
 aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was
 well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each
Roger died suddenly on December 5 of a perforated rectum. The police
 report says he was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha
 Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip
 showing and a sledge hammer laying nearby.
His wife Diane was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury
 took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defence that
 Roger somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club. 


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