Tuesday, October 21, 2008



are you kidding??? you can barely tell them apart! this is tom cruise and katie holmes, in case you couldn't tell....

Monday, October 13, 2008

the dirty old redneck...

so my dad and i went to the dallas stars game on friday night. it was the opening home game of the season and i was super excited about going. i LOVE hockey. i prefer to watch it over football..probably because unlike most kids in texas, i grew up going to hockey games, not football games. as excited as i was, i knew what we were getting ourselves in to by going. here's my dad and here's me...8 months pregnant. we got more looks from people...i guess trying to figure out what's the deal. as we were walking in to the american airlines center, our conversation went a little like this...

dad: people are already staring...

me: well, we look so much alike, maybe they'll figure we are father and daughter..(wishful thinking on my part)

dad: oh, great. they'll think we are imbreaders.

me: uh, gross.

dad: just walk a few steps behind me..(he was joking, of course)

me: no, that's worse! then they'll think you MAKE me walk behing you as a sign of submission or something!

so we proceeded in and went to the stars club. of course, my dad got a beer while i drank my water. good times. so then i got to thinking, here he is in his cowboy boots, drinking, and they think he brought along his young, pregnant wife to be his designated driver. typical redneck. or typical dirty old redneck. i watched people's faces as we sat down. first they looked at me, then down at my huge belly and then immediately looked over at my dad with this look, like they were wanting to say, "how dare you." it was quite amusing. i guess we need to get t-shirts that say "i'm the daughter" and "i'm the father."

as long as his doesn't say "i'm the daddy" i think we'll be okay...there is a part during the game where they show different couples in the audience on the jumbo tron and they kiss for the camera. i was praying to god, buddha and whoever else was listening that they did not put us up there!

anyway, it was a GREAT game although we lost in over time.

we were supposed to go to the fair yesterday, but i talked myself out of it...as much as i wanted to stuff myself with all things fried, i just wasn't up for the walking.

the baby is measuring at 36 weeks...and i'm just now at 33. he already weighs 5 pounds 8 ounces. at this rate, if i go until november 21, he'll probably come out crawling. which would mean less pushing, right??

i was supposed to go back to austin today but have decided to stay another night here at my parent's...there is something i seem to get more of here than at home...REST.

a lady told me today that there is only 10 weeks until christmas...can you believe it??? hard to believe since it's still 90 degrees outside.

well, that's all i got for now..happy monday!

Thursday, October 9, 2008

i love this...

my mom sent this to me and i've seen it before~may even have posted it on here~but it's so funny! enjoy!


It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for
them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger.
When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's
nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Jim. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Terri. When I
retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Terri to get a full-time job along with
her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half
an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her
time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table.

I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable.
I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door. She used to do the dishes
as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for
several hours after dinner.

I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't
clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to
get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for
her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for
better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two
or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing
lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to
think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to
take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene.
I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade
and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well
make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Terri. I'm not saying that
showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it
impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older.
However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife
because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile After all, we are
put on this earth to help each other.

Signed, Jim

Jim died suddenly on September 7th. of a perforated rectum. The police report says Jim
was found with a Calloway nine iron golf club jammed up his rear end, with only 5 inches
of grip left showing.

His wife Terri was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 10
minutes to find her "not guilty". Accepting her defense that Jim, somehow without looking,
accidentally sat down on his golf club.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

random tidbits....

~ is it just me, or is ronald mcdonald the creepiest looking thing ever?? seriously. how did he ever appeal to young children? he creeps my ass out.

~my two year old recognizes oprah and barack obama and calls them by name. think are t.v. is on a little too much?? that was a rhetorical question...no need to answer.

~why does my husband keep clipping his toenails into the bathtub when the trash can is a just a few feet away??

~i watched a show last night about a couple who are about to have their 14th child and all i kept thinking is does she have to use duct tape to keep her uterus from falling out?

~i wonder if he didn't before, does o.j. believe in karma now???

~with all the advances in medicine, i wonder if they are close to impregnating a man? you think they got someone working on that one? if not, someone needs to get on that. i'd pay good money.

~why are there still directions on the back of shampoo bottles. i think we got it by now. and does anyone actually repeat?

~how long has sesame street been on the air?

~why is a man assertive and a woman a bitch? not that i care..i wear my bitch badge with pride.

~do you think it's okay to take a bottle of wine in your bag to the hospital? to have AFTER the baby is born, of course.

~i believe they should give you a catheter and epidural during your last month of pregnancy....simply for convenience reasons.

~why is it that the people that won't go out and vote will be the ones that do the most complaining about the results?? VOTE, PEOPLE!!! i mean, it's just our future we are talking about.  

~why can't i find time to take a good nap??

~i'm going to the state fair this weekend and plan on eating everything that is bad for me...which is everything at the fair. they have fried bacon, people. you might as well inject the lard directly into your veins.

that's all i got right now..happy tuesday!